Squabble
by AshGlitter
Summary: Another morning of hungover for Gintoki. But why is there a 24 inch tele in the living room! Pairing: GinHiji, Fluff.


**AUTHOR NOTE: Heyya guys! This is one of my attempted oneshots for Ginhiji which I wrote a few days ago. I'm not really sure if it is good haha. Nevertheless, I want to share it with you and really hope you guys like it. Leave a review so I can improve. Critics welcome. Forgive me if my english sucks lol. Hope that the story is there hehe. Okay enough of me!**

 **Enjoy Reading lovelies!**

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 ***** Squabble*****

 **Pairing: GinHiji**

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Gintoki drank too much last night. Hungover dreaded him from waking up.

Still in yesterday's clothes, the silver permed man slept at the couch, wrapped up in a blanket. His snoring was getting on Kagura's nerves as she kicked the couch, causing Gintoki to fall like a dead log.

"Oi, oi," Gin sat up and grumbled, rubbing his head. "What's the big idea?"

"It's morning, idiot Gin-chan! How long are you going to sleep?!" Kagura yelled on the top of her lungs and Gintoki immediately cupped his ears from listening.

"Stop being noisy, Kagura-chan. You're not my mother."

"Ohayo!" Shinpachi enters the house to see the two in the middle of squabbling. "Gin-san, you had a hungover again."

"Isn't it obvious?" Gin sighed as he climbed up to the sofa for seat. "What the hell are you holding, Pattsan? Is that your sister's omelette again? Are you stupid, Pattsan? Told ya don't ever bring it here again. My house is not a garbage dump."

Kagura pinched her nose. "Well, you smell like one! Disgusting!"

"Pattsan, feed that pig before I give her dog food," Gin ordered Shinpachi.

"Ora!" Shinpachi opened the bento box. "She's improving, ya know. It's not black anymore."

"Don't lie to me! It's still burnt!"

"But if you see it by this angle, it's actually dark brown."

"Shut up, boy with Sister Complex! I rather eat dog food with Sadaharu!" Kagura snapped. "Ne, Gin-chan! I ran out of sukonbu! Give me money! You owe me three months pay anyway."

"Are you crazy? Look at me. Do I look Iike I have money now?" Gin scowled.

In a heartbeat, his collar was grabbed by the China girl and she shook him relentlessly for money. As they continued bickering, Shinpachi took notice of the 24 inch television on the wall.

"Ano, Gin-san," Shinpachi pointed at the tele. "How did that get here?"

"Oh!" Kagura gasped. "I just saw it too! Ne, Shinpachi, how much can I get if I sell that?!"

"Are you listening to me?! I'm asking how that thing got here! Did you steal it, Gin-san?!" Shinpachi panicked, shouting at the man.

Digging his ear with one finger, Gintoki sighed. "I can't remember. When I got home, it's already there. I tried to switch it on but I didn't know how to until I saw the battery pocket empty."

Shinpachi flinched. "Ehhh? That huge tele runs on batteries?!"

"Hai!" The man with dark eyebags pulled out his wallet. "I was lazy to go out and buy since it was already late yesterday. Here, take this money to buy those batteries, Pattsan. And Kagura- Oi!"

He did not get to finish his sentence because Kagura snatched his wallet and made a run with Sadaharu.

"No worries, Gin-san! I catch her and buy your batteries. Meanwhile, finish my sister's breakfast," Shinpachi left with an intimidating smile.

Gintoki huffed as he stared at the burnt omelette. Shinpachi was right about the colour. Gintoki could see a shade of brown on it or maybe he was hallucinating. He brought it closer to sniff it but ended up pouring his vomit into the box.

"Yabe," Gintoki cussed and moved to the kitchen to dump it in the sink. His vomitting continued for a few more times before he took a gargle and drank a glass of water.

Hungover was a pain in the ass.

Taking off his white hakama, he strolled to the living room again, only in his black shirt and pants. Somehow the 24 inch television was disturbing him. He stood right in front of it, scratching his disarray silver hair with a dead boring gaze. Kagura's idea of selling it was givng hope for quick money whereas Shinpachi's negative notion of it being stolen struck his conscience.

"What should I do with this? Should I just throw it away?" Gintoki thought loudly. "Wait, isn't it hot today? Mah, that brat is not here so it won't hurt to take off my shirt."

A silent squeal was emitted behind the television. Lo and behold, it was Sarutobi hiding in it.

'Ah, yes, Gin-san! Take off your clothes! Everything please! So exciting that my megane is blurred by the heat on my face! Ah, Gin-san! I've been waiting for this day seeing you naked all for myself! Kyaaaa~' Sarutobi mentally screamed in bliss as her eyes were fixed on half-naked Gin-san.

Gintoki dropped back to the couch, arms resting back as his legs crossed over. Sarutobi was already half-fainting, her eyes licking every inch of his bare skin. Forget the scars, Sarutobi deemed Gintoki having the perfect skin any woman wanted to touch.

"What time is it already?" Gintoki suddenly scowled. "Making me wait. Just cruel."

'No, Gin-san! Don't tempt me! I know you want me to blow my cover. But I know you will push me away. That's right! I must be strong and remain where I am! I want to see more! I'll be here like a good girl and yearn to touch you, Gin-san! Go ahead! Let loose! I'm happy with just seeing you from here! Ah, my sadistic lover Gin-san!"

"Tadaima."

Sarutobi cringed, hearing someone enter the premise. The sound of that voice was nothing like Kagura or Shinpachi.

Gintoki looked at the direction of the door. "Oi, what're you doing?"

Boots clapped against the floor, in sync with her heartbeat. Sarutobi strained herself to see who the unexpected visitor was. Her jaw dropped wide open when a man in Shisengumi uniform appeared, blowing smoke from his mouth.

"I had to finish a few errands before coming here," Hijikata seethed. "Unlike you, jobless man. What's with that face? You drank with that homeless bastard again?"

Gintoki made a side smile. "We lost some games and some money so we drank our way home."

"Bunch of losers," Hijikata scoffed and sat on the other end of the couch. "Why am I even here?"

'That's supposed to be my question, idiot! Why is that police guy here? No way! Did someone make a police report on Gin-san? What is going on?! Don't arrest him! I haven't seen the good parts yet! Let him be! Arrest him another day! Go away!' Sarutobi prayed, feeling the tension between the two.

Gintoki gritted his teeth. "Who said you can sit, mayora ah?!"

"Uruse nah," Hijikata plucked off his cigarette from his lips and blew a smoke. "Don't go big bang theory on me. You're a dumb idiot, not a physicist who claimed his spot on the couch because of some phenonema."

"Don't give me that crap! This is my house! I decided whether you can sit here or not!" Gintoki vehemently yelled at the uniformed lad.

'That's it, Gin-san! Make him leave! Tell him to go away! He got the wrong guy! Just push him away-wait, what are you doing, Gin-san?!'

Sarutobi was sure Gintoki was making Hijikata leave when Gintoki pulled Hijikata by the hand. Only when that pull was to make Hijikata sit in between his legs, Sarutobi hyperventilated.

'What is he doing?! Hijikata is not in a good sitting position. No, why is he even sitting here?! You're supposed to make him leave, Gin-san! Wait, this position is wrong! Isn't it wrong? Why are you putting him there? Maybe you're gonna strangle him! Yes! That must be it!'

Arms gently wrapped around Hijikata's waist. Gintoki hooked his chin on Hijikata's shoulder, resting his head against Hijikata's.

"Can you stop making me wait? You're lucky those brats are gone for awhile now. If not, when will there ever be time like this?" Gintoki purred under Hijikata's ear.

The officer eventually grinned, extinguishing his cigarette. His free hand reached the messy curls of silver hair and gave it a rough tousle.

"Gomen," was all Hijikata said. The man was not good with words at times like this.

Well, at times like this, Sarutobi was in that tight compartment, ogling at the sight of two man hugging back to back. 'Wait a second. Wait a second! What is going on?! Why are they cudddling like two dogs in heat? No way, was Gin-san actually expecting him just now? But why? Why him of all people! Oi, officer! Where are you touching? That's mine, asshole! Don't touch Gin-san beautiful perms! That's mine! That's mine!'

"Oi, you really stink," Hijikata did not hold back a comment, sniffing the lad's hair.

"Liar. You like this smell."

"What are you talking about?"

"You think I didn't know about you sniffing my hair whenever you wake up next to me?"

Sarutobi could not even think straight anymore. 'Ehhh? Wake up next to him? What is the meaning of this? Have you two slept-no! This is a joke! It's a lie!'

Knowing that Hijikata refused to reply, Gintoki nibbled his earlobe. The officer's entirety stiffened under Gintoki's embrace. Hijikata's way of hiding his embarrasment was turning him on.

"Where is my kiss? You dare come over here without giving me a kiss, Hi-ji-ka-ta-kun," Gintoki spoke through the nibbling of the flesh.

Hijikata has turned beet-red, his jaw probably clenched tight while his head was unable to process answers for Gintoki. Sarutobi however was in any moment to burst in anger.

When Gintoki released his ear bruised and red, Hijikata hummed nervously. "Are you blind? Didn't you see me smoking just now? Don't blame it on me if those kids smell cigarette breath from you."

"Excuses after excuses," Gintoki breathed deliberately at his ear. "You love to hurt Gin-san's feelings."

Gintoki pinched Hijikata's chin and directed his face aligned with his. They both stared for moment, getting lost in each other's eyes.

'No way! This is a joke! Why are you lovey dovey when you both always bicker like two chickens fighting over who lay their eggs first?! This cannot be right! You two are fooling around! Kagura, Shinpachi! Why are they taking so long to come back? Hurry up and stop Gin-san from kissing that disgusting chimney!'

Sarutobi was at the edge of giving up hiding as the two faces inched closer by every second. When Gintoki closed his eyes, Sarutobi could feel her heart plummeted to the ground. The man of her life, the one who she adored and worshipped was going to kiss a man in uniform who did not even look like he deserved it. Her mind went hectic, wires flinging everywhere untamed, her conscience screaming to bust through the screen.

Her urge became worse when her eyes connected with the indigo ones.

'Ehhhh? Is he looking at me?!'

"Are, what is that?" Hijikata became distracted, noticing the tele. Without a sign, he unwrapped himself from Gintoki, leaving his partner fume in frustration.

"Oi, Mayora! Are you stupid? You are really stupid, seriously! Can't you read the atmosphere, baka?" Gintoki scowled as Hijikata approached the tele.

Hijikata acknowledged the frame to be huge, definitely as big as the ones at the headquarters. What he could not tell was Sarutobi's brimming anger for being examined by someone other than Gintoki.

"Yorozuya, where did you get this?" Hijikata drawled, measuring the size by his arms. "How can you afford this?"

A hand shot on his shoulder and he was swivelled around to have his back hurled against the screen. Gintoki pinned Hijikata, his own hands over his wrists, foreheads barely touching.

"Mayora, are you here for this TV or for me? Answer me!" Gintoki demanded with a booming voice, even Sarutobi was affected. Gintoki never sounded so desperate to anyone like he was to Hijikata.

'What is going on? Are they for real? Are they really together? His eyes has turned red, like hot scalding red. Gin-san, is it true that you're in love with this mayonnaise addict?!' Sarutobi began to contemplate, her eyes wet from a stinging sensation.

"Oi," Hijikata grunted. "Let go of me. You're hurting my hands. I said let go."

"Kuso," Gintoki exhaled in exasperation. "I should have known. You got tired of me. You are bored of me, right, Hijikata-kun?"

Sarutobi bit her nails, having the strong feeling that she should not be here witnessing this. Their romance was short-lived and now they were going to break into an argument that was way different than the squabbles they had before. This was surreal, more intense and heartbreaking that Sarutobi felt as though she was watching the climax of a drama. How ironic that she was inside the tele watching this happening outside.

It felt incredibly insane. Even if Sarutobi denied it, her heart was rooting for them to be together.

Holy rainbow unicorn. What has the world turned into?!

Her thoughts disappeared when Gintoki was dragged to be pinned down instead. Hijikata hovered him, wearing a pissed off face.

"I said it hurts, didn't I?!" Hijikata boomed, furrowing his brows so deeply that his nerves popped out on his forehead. "And what makes you think you deserved to be angry, ah, sugar freak?"

"Oi, my wrists!" Gintoki yelped, showing how Hijikata was not holding back from his anger.

Hijikata leaned forward, burning his glare so hot that Sarutobi could feel his warmth. "When I spent the whole night working, you went out with a guy whom you cheated me with before. Who has the right to be angry right now, ah?!"

"Not my fault! You're busy! I was bored!"

"Teme! Can't you stay home and do nothing like you used to?"

"I'm not your freaking wife, mayora!"

Sarutobi swallowed hard seeing how tables were turned, Hijikata being possessive over Gintoki. All this was too much for Sarutobi to understand. A beat of silence ensued and Sarutobi waited for the next move, her heart clung on every second that past them.

'Officer, please don't scold Gintoki. He might be an idiot but he is strong and caring and handsome! Make up with him! Kiss him or whatever it is. I don't care anymore. If you are the one for Gin, I have to accept it. I will still root for him though. No, I just want to see him happy. Please, officer. Forgive his foolisheness and kiss him."

"Ah, you're right," Hijikata finally released Gintoki. "I am tired of you."

Gintoki straightened up. "What did you say?"

"I speak louder then. I am tired of you, Yorozuya!"

Sarutobi had her fists clenched tight. 'No. This is not happening.'

"So the truth is out," Gintoki hung his head low. "Then you won't mind if I just hooked up with that ninja girl."

Hijikata snorted. "Go ahead. I don't give a care-"

A fist shot out from the screen and rammed hard against the vice chief's cheek, making him fall to the floor.

Gintoki batted his eyes in shock. "You..."

Sarutobi glanced at Gintoki and offered a small smile. Her eyes moved to Hijikata who winced in pain.

"Listen up, asshole," Sarutobi glared angrily at the officer who held his own breath. "I'm giving you anorher chance. You better make up all the time you lost with him. If I find out that you don't treat Gin-san good, I'll assasinate you."

Hijikata frowned. "Who the hell are you?"

Sarutobi pinned her arms on her hip. "Gin-san machositic lover of course!"

"Don't know, " Hijikata spat.

Sarutobi looked at Gin. "Don't give up, Gin-san. Let me to be the one to wait for you instead. You're always be in my heart."

"Sarutobi..." Gintoki muttered, feeling touched.

She turned away and headed to the window. "And rest assured, whatever happened here remains inside these four walls. So see ya!"

The megane ninja leaped and made an escape from roof to roof, feeling bliss and proud of herself.

Sometimes love does not mean you have to own that person.

"Itte itte," moaned Hijikata as he stood up, cupping his cheek. "Your stalker is bloody dumb as you are, idiot."

Gintoki smiled as he watched her diminishing in sight. "Well, that gives me a month without seeing her from now. Finally, justice and freedom for me. But seriously, I didn't know she would watch us for that long. Is she a secret Yaoi fangirl or something?"

Hijikata grumbled and fixed his uniform. "Who cares about that bitch?"

Gintoki smelled jealousy. "Eh?"

Hijikata looked away, with irk written all over his face. "Then it settled. We're even."

"Yeah, yeah," Gintoki looked at the officer and smirked. "For acting out with me just now, I promised I won't speak a word to Kondo about you complaining him last night."

Hijikata flinched. "You promised! You really promised me okay? Not a word!"

"Hai, hai," Gintoki answered him lazily. "Did you enjoy it?"

"What?"

"You know," Gintoki smirked even wider. "Being in my arms and being watched. You do enjoy these things, right? I can hear your heartbeat-"

Hijikata grabbed him by the collar. "I'll kill you if you tell anyone."

The silverhead played with his fingers pretending he was zipping his lips. Hijikata pushed him away.

"There won't be a next time, baka! As if I liked you touching me here and there, asshole! You're the one who cannot resist me, damn yorozuya! Just admit, stupid hentai!" Hijikata said, massaging his jaw.

Gintoki clicked his tongue. "Can you stop that? Ending every sentence with a name degrading me? You're getting the other purple head's disease."

"Shut up," Hijikata felt exhausted. With a straight face, he walked away. "It looks that I'm done here. I have work to do, so goodbye."

"Goodbye," Gintoki responded dully.

Hijikata had his hand on the door when Gintoki gripped him by the shoulder.

"Oi, you forget something."

"What?"

"This."

Hijikata turned around and in a blink of an eye, Gintoki locked lips with Hijikata. The kiss was short yet filled with passion that Hijikata grew weak in his knees, his hands finding support on Gintoki's arms. Still feeling the pain in his cheek, Hijikata pulled away gently, thankfully Gintoki giving in. Once again, Hijikata leaned on Gintoki, his nose buried in his silver hair.

Gintoki smirked at his ear and whispered, "Do you really think you can escape from my kiss?"

Hijikata chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

Hijikata pressed his hot lips on Gintoki's ear. "They're already here."

A low growl of irk sounded by the taller lad as he took a step back. Hijikata grinned at how upset Gintoki was as it was obvious he wanted more.

"Oi," Hijikata distracted him and threw a bottle of mayonnaise.

Gintoki caught it and sighed. Only when Hijikata pecked a quick kiss on his cheek, his face brightened up like a light bulb. Without another word, Hijikata left the house and found the two kids of Yorozuya standing outside, looking nervous.

"Ano, Hijikata-san," Shinpachi appeared worried. "What brings you here?"

"There was a report of a stolen tele," Hijikata answered quickly.

Kagura looked unconvinced as she sucked on her sukonbu.

Shinpachi gasped, "But Gin-san can't remember anything-"

"Have no worries," Hijikata cut in. "He's not the guy."

"Then what happened to your face? Did Gin-san do that?"

"Nah," Hijikata said boringly. "That ninja stalker of his did. I was just having a normal conversation with your leader and she just appeared."

"Normal?" Kagura snorted. "When did you two ever talk normally, mayonnaise freak?"

"Stop digging too deep, China," Hijikata made a move, walking away. "Should I give your leader a hint about you and Sougo?"

Kagura exploded as red as her dress. "Teme! You won't dare!"

"What's with you and Okita-san?" Shinpachi asked as soon as Hijikata disappeared at the stairs.

"None of your concern," Kagura pouted.

"Ehhh?" Shinpachi grumbled. "I'm feeling left out here. What is going on really?"

"Listen Pattsan," Kagura smirked evilly. "Don't you think they are together?"

"Eh? Hijikata-san and Gin-san?!"

Abruptly the door of Yorozuya was slid open and Gintoki marched out, surely forgetting he was topless. Shinpachi and Kagura were shocked at Gin's sudden appearance. In his hand was a mayonnaise bottle and he hurled it to hit Hijikata on the head.

"Take back your stupid bottle, mayora! And don't just barge in ever again! Teme, what makes you think I stole that TV! Don't joke with me!"

The officer snapped after getting hit twice. "Teme Yorozuya! I'll kill you! I'll arrest you for hitting a police officer in broad daylight! You better watch your ass, idiot!"

"Like I care! Don't show your face here again, baka tax robber!"

"As if I want to see your face, stupid permed freak!"

Gintoki and Hijikata looked away sharply and their squabble ended with the door shut loudly.

Shinpachi shook his head and laughed at Kagura. "It can't be, Kagura-chan. They hate each other to the core."

"Whatever," Kagura entered the house, followed by a laughing megane.

The mayonnaise bottle was picked up and turned around to see words written in black marker, a reply from the silver head,

"Tonight sounds fine. Don't make me wait, Baka Mayora!"

A smirk crept on Hijikata's face, pocketing the bottle and lighting up his cigarette.

"I'll be there, Baka Yorozuya."

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